The Mission is Definitely Changing Me


Well I’m going to make it quick this week. I’m tired and its been a really long week, so I don’t have much to say.  We had a baptism Friday for the couple that we’ve been working with.  We finally got them married and then baptized!  So besides the fact that baptisms are the most stressful thing in the world, because we have to call all the members to come and plan it all ourselves and clean the church the day of, it was great because they were really ready to get baptized.  What a great day!

Like I said, this week was really hard.  I’m getting really frustrated with the fact that no one understands what I’m saying still, my lessons are really bad, and I feel like I’m not doing anything. I feel like this isn’t how it should be going.  I’m worried the spirit isn’t with us a lot, and I don’t know maybe I’m looking for the burning bush when it’s really only a match….. I want to be a lot better than I am right now.  I want to be able communicate with people and I can’t.  So that frustration has really hit an all-time high.  But I also think this will definitely be a learning experience.  Like I have said in other letters, I think this experience will make my faith grow.  I’m going to have to rely on the lord and His power.  I may feel like I’m doing nothing, but there are a lot of things I can’t see too.  I have to have faith that the people will understand me and that the spirit will speak to them.  I have to have faith that people will keep commitments.  I have to have faith that I can do this, and that I was called here for a reason.  I have to have faith that I’m doing something important even though I feel like I’m not doing enough. And above all, I need to remember that this is the Lord’s work and it will carry on how He wants it too. I think I’m going to learn a bit of humility.  I don’t like looking dumb, and learning a new language tends to make you look dumb a lot.  So I need to learn humility and just accept help in the language, in the lessons, and in other things that I need to change.  I also think I will learn a bit of patience.  I can’t expect everything to be perfect at first, or ever really. Jordan Burroughs didn’t get good at wrestling in four months, and I can’t expect that I will be an awesome missionary in four months either. I just need to be patient and continually try to be better. So your letters today really helped me.  I also do need to work a little harder because as I do that, all the other worries I have won’t be important.  I need lose myself in the work as the saying goes. And I’m exhausted all the time, so maybe I’m doing that part right.  But I feel like I’m not and can always do more for sure.  So I’ve got some things to learn.  The mission is definitely changing me!  Love you guys! 

Elder Ollis

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